Friday, December 26, 2003

A PLACE CALLED "JUST IS"

I wonder what it would be like to live in the place called "Just Is" like Peggy does!

I can't imagine what it would be like to forget Christmas or to forget my life!

 I admit that sometimes it would be nice to forget the pain I have experienced but that would also mean the lessons learned from the pain would be erased as well. The pain and joy that I have experienced  have been great teachers!

Peggy is getting worse and I am aware that one day she will not be able to talk to me. I cannot imagine not hearing Peggy's voice in my life.

I continue to try and wrap my mind around the concept of no past or future.  We are all a combination of our pasts, our present and our futures. Those memories dictate how we live our lives every day.    

Peggy doesn't seem to be scared or afraid at all.      She has no fear of what will become of her as she slides into Alzheimer's Disease a little more every day. I am thankful for that and that she is living in a happy place called "Just Is."

Peggy's "Just Is" place is a place where she is content and happy.                               

In her Place.. She is the one who decides who will visit her durning the day.      There are never unwanted or uninvited guests. There are only guests that make her happy.

I am thankful that Peggy's "Just Is" place is a safe and a happy enviorment as she continues on her journey and slowly disappears.

Some times, I would like to knock on the door of her mind and have her invite me inside so I could visit and understand what she is feeling.. BUT,

That is Impossible because..

She Lives in a place where she has Forgotten... AND

I Live in a Place Where...

I CAN'T REMEMBER TO FORGET!

I Love You Today, Peggy

Mary Louise

2 comments:

duckebride323 said...

{{{hugs}}} To you and prayers of strength to get you through. Hang in there, and love your sister while you have her.

teebje said...

I can tell you take comfort in the fact that Peggy is happy in her "just is" place. I wish you could be happier. You seem to be a much stronger person than I am.