Tuesday, February 19, 2008


Peggy had a birthday on February 13th.

Mother always said she was her Valentine baby. She was our whole families Valentine.

I thought of her on her day and remembered all of the past birthdays that she was privileged to have and remember.

This one was a special birthday. A milestone birthday. Her husband took her a cake and had her blow out a candle.......

 But to Peggy..........

It was just another day.

Another day of living with people in a nursing facility that she doesn't know.

Another year of having someone that she doesn't remember say........

Happy birthday, Peggy!

Another day of trying to figure out what a birthday is......what a cake is...what a candle is.....and.....

Who these people are!

I Love you Today, Peggy!

Happy Birthday


Mary Louise

Monday, February 11, 2008


Grief is an on going process. You never get finished as I have realized.

I find myself back at the door of anger.

Peggy is gone but still here. Missing but present.

I hate what this disease has done to my beautiful sister.

I hate what this disease has done to me.

Sometimes, I feel numb when I think of Peggy and other times....

I'd like to shake her and say...Wake up, stop it!

Life keeps moving forward and I find myself right back at

another of the revolving stages of grief.....Anger.

It is like living in the movie "Ground Hog Day".

I am glad you cannot know or feel how angry I am at you tonight, Peggy.

I am just tired, tonight.

Tired of knowing you are there but you are not.

I love you today anyway, Sister.        

Mary Louise