I talked with Peggy's sitter this morning before I talked to her..She handed Peggy the phone and said: It's MaryLouise....
(Peggy)Hello
(ML) Good Morning! How are you today?
(P) Good.
(ML) Who is visiting today? (She has people that visit her in her mind).
(P) Barbara is here. (Barbara is in Atlanta)
I needed to know if she knew who she was talking to so I said,
What about Mary Louise? Does she ever come to visit?
(P) Yes, I think she is coming with Barbara today or yesterday.
She didn't know it was me on the phone!!!!!
I wish that I had not asked now.
The conservation ended with...
(ML) I love you today, Peggy.
(P) O K..Bye
I am wondering this morning if my calls mean anything to her at all because I am just a stranger on the phone!
Wow...That realization hurts to my bones.
We used to make a square with our fingers that meant.....
LOVE YOU>>>MEAN IT!
We used the sign anytime we were in a situation where we couldn't talk.
It started when we were little girls.
We could break each other up with the SIGN. One of us would look up and see "The Sign" and it would immediately cause laughter especially in church or other serious situations where QUIET was the rule!
The last time that Peggy used "THE SIGN" was in the B'ham airport a few years ago. I was leaving to fly back home after a visit.
I looked out of the planes window and saw Peggy in the window of the airport making "The Sign" as the plane taxied away!
I made the sign back and smiled!
Today, When I hung up the phone, I thought.
Peggy has forgotten "OUR SIGN" TOO!
And so...
I am being erased from Peggy's memory a little more every day.
I'm glad that I can remember everything.......For her!
I love you today!
I'm making a square with my fingers........Peggy.
LOVE YOU.....MEAN IT!!!!!!!
MaryLouise
2 comments:
Hi Mary Louise....I'll bet if Peggy had her way she would make the sign for you:) There is too big of a lump in my throat to say any more!
Sometimes I am afraid to open your journal. Never knowing what I might find, I click on it and kinda peek with one eye. I want to read but I don't want to walk away sad. Sometimes I have to take a deep breath to keep from crying. You really need to consider turning this journal into a book. You tell it so well. Keep your chin up, enjoy this holiday time.
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