Thursday, June 17, 2004

THE DARK CLOUDS OF ALZHEIMER'S

I read a saying once that said...               

SINCE THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE...WE MIGHT AS WELL WARM OURSELVES!!!!!

That is how I feel about Peggy having Alzheimer's disease.  She has it and I can't change it so I  might as well warm myself on the LIGHT of Peggy that is still visible.

Yesterday and today's calls were different. She was trying hard to communicate with me but couldn't.

She said; I wonder..

What do you wonder??? I said.

Her reply was....I can't remember

Hearing Peggy struggle to remember is hard but she keeps trying and that is a trait that I have always admired in her.

Watching Peggy disappear from Alzheimer's disease is like watching a menacing storm approach. There is a bank of black clouds that resemble dark mountains in the distance. The darkness moves ever closer and continues to cover the blue and grey light of the sky.

Alzheimer's disease is that dark cloud...... it is covering the sun in Peggy's mind.  There is the rumble of thunder in the distance and it is promising a storm. A very destructive storm that will make the day look like night. Peggy was always afraid when it stormed but now, as her storm nears... she is very calm.

Her mind was as bright as the sun on a summer day. Now, darkness is sliding over her brain and covering her light.

I can still see the presence of Peggy shining around the darkness of the clouds. She is still shining to the best of her ability and that makes me smile.

I know that Alzheimer's will never give up until it's dark storm clouds have completely covered the light...

That was Peggy.

Photo by Burnt Canvas

I Love You Today, Peggy

Mary Louise

 

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Mary Louise,
I'm a complete stranger, but I came across your touching journal. May I ask the age of your sister? She looks so young in all the pictures.

Bless you. My thoughts are with you,

Anonymous said...

Never give up hope.  You may not know it, she may not know how to tell you, but Alzheimer's is a disease of the brain, not the heart.  She may not remember you, but she can still feel the love.  Always remember that.

Anonymous said...

Hi,
I came across your journal from Jeff Comedy's journal.  The love that you and your sisters share is an amazing, pure, incredible one that shines even across these impersonal pages on the Internet.  What an admirable, precious human being you are (and all of your sisters.)  I'm very touched by your words about Peggy and how you share all of this with us, I'm utterly amazed by it.  My thoughts and prayers for Peggy, for you, for all of your sisters and family--believe me...you are in my prayers.