I talked with Peggy today. If I asked her a question or made a statement all she would say was, Huh?
It was as if she had trouble hearing what I was saying. The volume of her life is being turned lower and lower.
Have you ever used a tube of toothpaste until it is nearly gone? You take your fingers and flatten out the tube and press from the bottom of the tube to the top to get a little more toothpaste to brush your teeth.
If you don't get enough doing that, you start rolling the tube from the bottom. Slowly some tooth paste appears and you can brush your teeth.
The next time you need to brush your teeth, you do the rolling thing again but this time after rolling the tube you bend it from side to side until a little tooth paste rises to the top.
The next time you reach for the toothpaste, you roll the tube from side to side and when that doesn't work, you stick your toothbrush down into the opening of the tube and get just enough toothpaste to brush one last time.
That is what it is like trying to talk with Peggy now.
She is like the empty tube of toothpaste. You can see just a little of her but there is no way to get anything out of her. No way to communicate and no way to have a conversation with her.
It has been like that all week. Her tube of life is used up and she has nothing much left to give.
I think she is entering another phase of the disease and is slipping further away.
I really thought that if I keep calling and reminding her that I love her that it will help.
I am losing that hope.
Peggy is dying and I can do nothing but try and get a little life from her every day. I keep rolling and pressing the tube that was Peggy to get any kind of a response and now, nothing is coming out.
Alzheimer's disease has taken a knife and cut off the bottom of the tube that was Peggy and all of who she was and who she could be has run out the bottom of the tube and is gone forever.
I love You Today, Peggy and I miss you!