I called Peggy this morning and I could tell that she didn't know who I was. I said; this is Mary Louise, your sister. There was silence....Then she hung up the phone.
I started to call back but decided to let it be..for today. It just hurt too much to call again.
Then I thought of the song "Bring On The Rain" by Jodee Messina and Tim McGraw.
Here are the words to the song and they express exactly how I am feeling as I write today.
BRING ON THE RAIN
Another day has almost come and gone. I can't imagine what else could go wrong.
Sometimes, I'd like to hide away somewhere and lock the door. A Single Battle Lost...but Not the War.
Cause tomorrow's another day and I'm thirsty anyway...so bring on the rain!
It's almost like the hard times circle round. A couple drops and they all start coming down. Yeah, I might feel defeated and I might hang my head. I might be barely breathing but I'm not dead.
Cause tomorrow's another day and I'm thirsty anyway...so bring on the rain.
No, I'm not gonna let it get me down and I'm not gonna cry. I won't lose any sleep tonight because....
Tomorrow's another day and I am Not Afraid...So bring on the rain.
I Miss You Peggy!
My tears are for Not being remembered today. But my tears also wash out all the pain that builds up in my heart.
There are many people who come and go in our lives. A few touch us in ways that change us forever and make us better because we knew them.
Peggy is one of those people in my life.
I Love You Today, Peggy and I miss you more than I could ever write!
Stop telling God how big your storm is...
Tell your Storm how Big Your God is......
Mary Louise
8 comments:
You have such a sweet, loving spirit. God is helping you make it through this storm but it is still painful. So sorry about that. But your journal is a precious blessing. Truly! **Barb**
It has been several months since I've read your journal. As I still feel that "losing" a sister by Alzheimer's is far worse than having lost one in death. The recent entry has reinforced that feeling. It must be a heavy cross to carry each day as your sister's memory of you dissappears. My sister's death in November 03 has continued to hurt, but knowing she is around to talk to in spirit is comforting. I read your entry also on "your mother" 5/7 and it was felt in a very strong way. It was the story about every mother from the beginning of time. It will affect so many. I have not started my journal, my thoughts are still very jumbled, and it is still too sad. My brother, Bruce's death in Aug03 still hurts. I will someday put all my thoughts down as you have, until then I will continue to read your journal entries. God Bless and give you strength.
I am sorry to hear that your sister has that disease, truly I am. My friend, Crystal, her sister has it to. I Hope you have a good day, bye
amazing journal...my heart goes out to you. My biggest fear is losing someone to Alzheimer's Disease. You and your sister will always be in my thoughts and prayers!
Mary,
I have a parent wtih Alzheimer's You entries are very inspirational and I found them to be very comforting to me.
HI Mary!
I read before that you want to put a guestbook in your journal. I just recently learned how to do it. If u want I'll explain it to you.
I really love your yournal. It's full of feelings and love I have never seen in any other journal.
Thank you for writing and sharing it with us.
Paula.
Bring on the Rain! I thought it was terrible and it was to loose my mom. But to loose your sister so young to such a long slow process of diabolical death is so unfair and it rips you apart. You are a strong woman or it is making you one, full of compassion. I think that is what it is doing for me, reading your journal. Hugs.
Stop telling God how big your storm is...
Tell your Storm how Big Your God is......
You do this every day. And forgive the storm, to boot.
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