Friday, October 21, 2005

DEAR GOD

Dear God,

It's me again.

I know that I talk to you a lot about many things.

Thanks for listening to me every day about my sister.

This morning, I want to talk to you about Peggy.

I know that you remember her because she used to talk to you a lot too.

She has forgotten how to talk now and so I will ask you some questions for her.

There were five children in our family, why was Peggy singled out to get a disease like Alzheimer's? Why not me?

Why did she develop Alzheimer's disease in her 40's when, if she had stayed well, she could have done a lot more good?

Why do bad things happen to good people?

I was pretty angry with you when Peggy got sick, God. I know you felt my anger but you allowed me to work through it. Thanks.

I know you are a loving God, so.....

Did you cry when Peggy found out her diagnoses?

Do you cry for her now?

It is raining outside today. Are those your tears?

God, please stay close to Peggy because she needs you even though she doesn't remember who you are any longer.

Is there a special place in your heart for people who don't remember who you are any longer?

We have something in common this morning God because Peggy doesn't remember me any longer either.

I know you know how it feels to lose someone you love.

That is why it is so comforting to talk to you every day because you know all and have experienced all.

Peggy is a special person but you know that about her because you sent her into my life.

God, I know that you have a lot to worry about as you see what has been happening on earth lately. So much destruction, war and loss of life.

Thank you for remembering one person in the mist of it all, my sister Peggy.

Thank you for loving Peggy even though she has forgotten who you are.

Thank you, God for these talks every day because they really help as I try to understand and live with loss.

It is as if I am a puzzle, in pieces all over the floor and you stooped down, picked up a piece of my life and said; this is where we will start Mary Louise..... One piece at a time.

It is nice to know that I can talk to you at any time, day or night and I know you are listening and caring and that.....

You are crying with me!

I Love You Today, Peggy and...

God sends much love to you this morning!

PS....

Peggy, I want you to know that one piece of my broken puzzle is back in place. There is a lot more to put back before the puzzle of my life is complete without you in it.......

But, one piece is back in place this morning.

God told me!

Mary Louise

 

 

 

 

 

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

wow. that is such a meaningful prayer.  would you mind if i shared that with someone who is hurting badly like you?  this will help her.

i believe that god cries for us/with us.  just like he laughs at us/with us.

you and peggy are so helpful to others.  this terrible loss of peggy's memory is not in vain.  god is still using her and you for the good of his world.

i believe god is with you and peggy in a special way.  than you for sharing your special gifts.
love,
Wendy

Anonymous said...

One of your best entries. I know God's heart hurts when His children suffer; that He loves Peggy more than anybody else ever has or ever could.
Big hugs,
Barb- http://journals.aol.com/barbpinion/HEYLETSTALK

Anonymous said...

You are so blessed by your belief in God. A beautiful prayer.Peggy would feel honored if she could know. Margo

Anonymous said...

How beautiful and what a tribute to true love as God intended it to be. Love bears all things and never gives up. Your love is a testament to this.

Anonymous said...

That was sooo beautiful! God does hear you & cry too!

Anonymous said...

Beautiful.  

Congratulations on your Vivi nomination!

Anonymous said...

Wow...powerful entries in a very powerful Journal......

Congratulations on the nomination!!!
Peace
Jodi
http://journals.aol.com/jouell3935/Haveyoulostyourmind
http://journals.aol.com/jouell3935/Messages/

Anonymous said...

Hi hon, Congratulations on your VIVI nomination.
Barb- http://journals.aol.com/barbpinion/HEYLETSTALK

Anonymous said...

If you ever need me to help you find those puzzle pieces mom...  I will be there on the floor searching for the right one... and I know... that together as a family we will be able to piece it all back together again... and that one piece in the middle that is missing... Peggy's piece... we can leave empty... and fill will all the tears, memories, moments and love you have given to her all these years... I know... that she has all of that there for you... all inthe form of a simple puzzle piece.  And Iknow,,, it will fit that space perfectly.

I am proud of you... and especially proud that you were honored withthe VIVI nomination!  You are reaching so many!  I love YOU today Mom!

Anonymous said...

Congratulations on your Vivi awards nomination!
journals.aol.com/republicanjen/RepublicanJen

Anonymous said...

Life is like puzzle pieces. Millions and millions of pieces with no box to see the completed picture. Some of the pieces are blank. We will never complete the picture. Maybe if we're lucky, we will piece together a small corner. But nothing that can give us a clue what it is. God sees the completed picture. He created it. So, we don't understand. We are children in His eyes. Your child asks to do something and you say no. You are older and wiser then they are. You understand what is best for them and what can harm them. God is like that. He is wiser than we are. We don't understand why He does what He does. But He is doing what is best. Besides, no one knows what Peggy is going through deep inside. I believe that she has a connection with God. I kind of know what you are going through. My grandpa had it and my dad a month before he died. He didn't know us. Just one month was heart breaking but I can't imagine what you go through. Just have faith that there are no boundries with God. He can reach Peggy. He has a plan for her. Only He knows what that is. God is with the both of you!

Anonymous said...

I love this prayer so much.  God wants us to talk to Him, just talk and He will listen.  I know He heard this prayer and I can say amen to it too.  I am so thankful that God has  our family in His Hands.  It is comforting to know that He has Peggy with Him now because she has left us in mind but not physically yet.  One day she will leave us physically and we will weep then as we do now.  One day we will be able to shout ....  Mother, the Ross Girls are home.  caragricke (Barbara)