Tuesday, March 1, 2005


I missed Peggy on Sunday night.

There were two national broadcasts that we watched together across the miles. One telecast was "Miss America" and the other was "The Oscars".

Our Oscar night ritual would play out like this... we would dress in  silk pajamas, pour a glass of wine or soda into our prettiest glasses.  The telephone was always by our side for those important consultations during the show.

We would call one another during the telecast and talk about the beautiful people on the red carpet, the gowns the ladies chose and our choice for the top awards.

We were both happy when the Oscar powers that be switched from saying..And the winner is...to... and the Oscar goes to!

I know that our way of watching the Oscar's or Miss America might sound silly to many people. Peggy and I realized that our ritual really didn't matter in the great scheme of things. But it was a fun way to share laughter and thoughts across the miles on a special evening.

This past Sunday night, I put on my best silk pajamas, poured a glass of wine and watched the Oscars.

I remembered all the years of sharing special Sunday night Oscar telecasts with Peggy and I smiled.

I'm glad that we shared some silly fun together.  I missed knowing the Peggy was as close as a phone call as I watched the show on Sunday night. I missed the sharing of our opinions on the movies and winners who received the coveted gold statue.

At the end of the show on Sunday night, when all the Oscars were given out and all the beautiful people were leaving the grand theater....I decided to make a acceptance speech of my own.

I raised my glass and thanked Peggy...

I stood before a packed living room. A packed living room full of memories of past Oscar telecasts, midnight calls and laughter.

I stood there in my silk pajamas, with my imagined Oscar and said through my tears....

There are so many people that I want to thank tonight for this honor.

I would like to thank my parents for bringing Peggy into my life.

I would like to thank my other Sisters and my Brother for their continued support.

I would like to thank Peggy's husband and daughter's for their dedication to her and their love for her.

I would like to thank each of my children for their love as I continue to write this movie about Peggy.

and last but not least..

I would like to thank my husband for walking this journey with me.  I would like to thank him for his love and care as I struggle with my part in a movie that continues to unfold in my life.

And finally.....

I would to thank Peggy, my sister, my forever friend for all the memories of growing up together. I would also like to thank her for the support and care that I have felt through our lives.

I also want to thank her for the part that she has played in the movie of my life.

And finally....

I would like to thank her for sharing silly Oscar nights in silk pajamas in front of the television and on the phone.

If an Oscar could be given for a sister and friend...Peggy would have been given a award tonight.

The movie of Peggy's life is slowly coming to an end. The film has broken and slaps the reel with a repeated click as the image of Peggy fades from the silver screen. Her image is being replaced by a flickering light and I only see flashes of the Peggy that I used to know as she continues to fade from the giant screen called life.....

Thank you, Peggy for giving me a small part in your movie. 

A movie called...............

Watching My Sister.....Disappear.

One of the wonderful things about having a part in Peggy's life movie is that...

I can always watch it in my memory reruns...wearing silk pajamas.

I Love You Today, Peggy!

Mary Louise



wendy4145 said...

I would definately have to continue theat TV PJ"S tradition with SOMEONE!  Maybe one of yoru other sisters or Melissa or Sheri?

I know they can't replace Peggy... but you cna still carry on the fun tradition of you and peggy.  

God Bless ya!

oobananas4uoo said...

it is so amazing that you are strong enough to keep a journal for all the world to see about someone....way to go and keep your chin up. :)

thebaabee said...

Mary Louise,
As you know I have been reading your tribute to Peggy for some time now.  It has continually touched my heart.  You know that my illness has brought to me the threat of memory loss.  I see it.  My family sees it more.  With your permission I would love to link your journal to mine.  And, dedicate an entry to your dedication to your sister.  Please let me know what you think about this.  Thank you LuAnne

dimundntheruf69 said...

this entry made me cry......tears of sadness for you and your family.....and tears of joy that I still have my awesome sister in my life.....I am so sorry...christie