Saturday, May 14, 2005

THE STORM OF ALZHEIMER'S DISEASE

There were bad storms last night in my corner of the world.

 

The wind was blowing and the trees were bowing as the force of the wind blew through their branches.

Lightening streaked through the black night sky and crackled as it turned night into day for seconds at a time.

I could hear the thunder rumbling in the distance and slowly get louder until there was a bloom that shook the windows in my house.

When I was a little girl and experienced a thunderstorm, I would think that God was moving furniture around in heaven and lightening was God turning off and on the lights. Sometimes, I would think that God was in the heavenly bowling alley and the thunder occurred when he rolled the ball down the lane to strike giant pins. When the ball hit the pins, it made the lightening.

Remembering all of this, I decided that it was time to go to the basement.

 To feel safe, I took a flashlight, a gallon of water, my little dog and fled down the stairs. Under ground, the sounds were not as big and didn't assault my ears. Underground, I couldn't see the flashes of lightening and the rolling thunder was muffled.

I felt very small as I watched the force of nature enter my world but in my safe place, under ground, I felt that I had some control over my fate.

I thought of a song that we used to sing in church when I was a little girl.

"Till the storm passes over, till the thunder rolls no more. Till the clouds roll forever from the sky. Keep me safe, let me stand in the hollow of your hand. Keep me safe until the storm passes by."

Alzheimer's disease entered Peggy's life like the horrific storm last evening.

There were signs that the storm was approaching but it came so quickly that Peggy could not find a safe place to hide. There was no place for her to go as the wind, lightening and thunder of the disease entered her brain.

It is as if she was standing in the middle of a field when the Alzheimer's storm blew into her body. The lightening, wind and thunder assaulted her body and brain with such force that all she could do was fall to the ground and assume the fetal position.

The storm still rages inside of Peggy. The lightening of the disease strikes her body and brain and hurricane force winds blow her thoughts and memories from her mind.   

The only safe place for Peggy now is in the love that surrounds her as she continues to disappear.

I watch my sister being destroyed by Alzheimer's disease and all I can do is hold her hand and sing.....

"Till the storm passes over and the thunder sounds no more. Till the clouds roll forever from the sky....

Keep Peggy safe, let her stand, in the hollow of your hand.

Keep Peggy safe until the storm passes by.......

I Love You Today, Peggy!

Mary Louise

 

 

 

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I always loved that song. I'm glad you remembered it; that it's giving you some comfort, if only a little. Hugs, and know I am praying for all of you. *Barb*

Anonymous said...

Mary Louise.... Storms I just love em but only the literal kind.  The ones that actually bring about a change in the weather.  Life storms, well I just think they really suck.  But my Dear Friend..... things do not go as planned in this little thing we call our lives.  I'm not saying I am used to any of it.  As, I am sure you feel the same way. I keep praying for you.  Love bunches LuAnne
http://journals.aol.com/thebaabee/LUANNESLIFELIVINGWITHLUPUS

Anonymous said...

the storm will someday be.. past and the clouds and sun will shine once again.. if even only in heaven..

Anonymous said...

this is a faith journey.  The sun will come out tomorrow.

Love,
Wendy

Anonymous said...

What a comforting song... I am sure that Peggy is in the hollow of His hand.

You know, I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one who used to go downstairs for refuge from a thunder storm.  I say, *used to*, because in the old house I live in now, I think I'm more afraid of the many spiders down there, than the thunder...lol...