Tuesday, November 21, 2006

MEMORIES...THE GOOD, THE BAD, THE UGLY

I think that memory has three parts...........

The Good, The Bad, The Ugly.

Peggy's memory has been erased and she doesn't have to deal with the three phases any longer. Or does she? 

What happened yesterday or an hour ago is gone from her brain, or is it?

Does she have to deal with the good, the bad or the ugly of her memory?

If she does, how does she cope with the flood of thoughts that can sometimes be frightening?

Personally, I like to remember all the good things that are stored in my memory. I would just as well have the bad and ugly erased.

But the truth is that we learn so much more from the bad and the ugly.

Have you ever thought about how memory works in our minds?

We RECALL good memories and this takes thought as we pull the good memories to the front of our mind. The bad and ugly memories just pop into our minds at any time....uninvited.

Every time I get on an airplane to fly, a bad memory floods my mind, no matter how hard I try to forget that near crash. The memory is burned into my mind and only comes out to haunt when I arrive at an airport. I don't have to try and recall it...it is just there...uninvited.

I know that Peggy's good memories have been erased but do the bad and ugly memories still come into her mind uninvited?

I have also wondered if she dreams at night. Does she have bad dreams occasionally like everyone else or are they gone as well?

I have so many unanswered questions about what Alzheimer's disease does to the brain.

I hope that the bad and ugly memories in Peggy's mind have been erased along with the good ones.

I hope that just like a new born baby...her memory and mind is clear except for the love, care and food that she needs at the moment.

I hope this is true because how could she understand the sudden, re -lived fear that accompanies a bad memory?

When I relive a bad or ugly memory, I can reassure myself that it is over and not real in my today world.

What about Peggy? Does she still have bad and ugly memories that visit her.....

Uninvited??

I Love You Today, Peggy and wish only good thoughts when you have flashes of memory.

I pray that only good memories are present in your mind on the ocassional days that you do remember.

I pray the the bad and ugly memories have been erased never to come and visit you...

Uninvited.

Mary Louise

5 comments:

joan3424 said...

You always have such interesting thoughts to ponder.

I think Alzheimer's patients live in the moment...
and once that moment has passed - they are in a new  moment.

I think this disease is much harder on the family than the patient,
I think the patient is spared all of the "bad stuff" ... they just
kind of slowly retreat into their own new world that we cannot
be a part of - I think its a kind and gentle world in which they
live - one that can be anything they want it to be.  It's just that
we can't go into this world with them, so we watch and wonder.

Interesting question as to dreams.  I'd love to know the answer
to that, as I'm sure we all would.  I would like to think that when
they  dream - that is their short visit back to "our world", but when
they wake up, they are back in their own new, worry-free world.
Maybe they are the lucky ones.

Happy Thanksgiving and God Bless you, your family & Peggy.

salemslot9 said...

I think that God is with her
during this time
I have faith in that

magogos said...

i pray so, too. margo

wendy4145 said...

That is a sweet prayer for Peggy.  I know God wants that for her too.  I believe that if good memories are gone.... that bad memories are too.  Her present continues to be good for her and that is a blessing.  I know God is with her in her present, past and future.

And also with you as you hurt for your sister and what she must be going through.

I wish all of you good memories and pleasant thoughts in your present.
love,
Wendy

reconcilinglife said...

Patients with this disease that I work with live in the moment from what I can see....I will be Thankful when there is a cure. Bam