Sunday, October 12, 2008


I have moved my journal about Peggy to this site.

I hope you will continue to read my thoughts and comment. It has helped me on this journey more than any of you will ever know.

People always said that Peggy and I looked so much alike that we could be twins. I must admit that I thought we looked somewhat alike but not like twins until.....

I visited a site called and put my face on a hairstyle that PJ always wore.
I was shocked!!!! When I saw the picture above, I thought it was Peggy but it is me with her hairstyle!

I Love You today, Peggy!

Mary Louise

Monday, October 6, 2008



                                      I was informed on September 30th by AOL

that they will be closing down their journal site.

Every one who has been writing journals on this 

 AOL site is very sad.

We have until October 31st to transfer all the

contents of our journals to another site or lose them.

My first entry about watching Peggy disappear was on October 30, 2003.



P. J. ( left) is dying from Alzheimer's Disease.

We were always very close.

It is so very hard to see her disappearing before my eyes.

I call her every morning and have since she was diagnosed 2 years ago.

She is slipping away fast and now calls me "Aunt Louise."

I struggle with losing her.

I miss her more than I can write.

Only people who have experienced this living death

can understand what I am feeling.

I am saying goodbye to her every day and

I always say before I hang up...I Love you, Today P. J

 and she will say...I love you too but she can't remember my name.

I love you. I miss you today.

 P J...My Sister...My Friend!

This was one of the first comments I received

and this comment helped me to keep writing and

 to express my grief with words.




Hi Mary Louise,
In all honesty, I had to find the courage within myself to get past the title of your journal before I could read it. My dad lost his youngest brother to this terrible disease it was devastating to say the least. The reason I needed courage to read your journal is because I watched my youngest sister disappear to cancer. We lost her 15 months ago, her funeral was on her 44th birthday. I hope you don't mind if I read your journal from the beginning and go forward to the present time because I feel that is the only way you get to know someone better. I do not have a journal but my daughter does and introduced me to journals after I lost my lil sis. I must say it has helped me through the grief one day at a time.

Did you ever hear that saying " I complained I had no shoes, until I met a man with no feet?" Sometimes my days seem so hard because I have a child with Tourettes Syndrome. Its not drastic or life threatening but it still drains my heart and soul. My heart goes out to you and your family. I have no shoes but you have no feet. I will say a prayer for your sister.


I know what your going thru...My dad is slowing disappearing too.  It i so sad to see.  Just hang in there and be strong she is going to heaven!!!

Very touching commentary. I would not have recognized Peggy. But I have not seen her in decades I suppose.
this blog is a good idea.
thanks for sharing.


Mary Louise,

I know it must be very hard dealing with Alzheimer's and losing your baby sister. I know it would crush me if I lost my sister. You have been strong and brave to write the journal and share your experience with others.

I am proud of you. I am praying for you, PJ, her family and your other sisters.

God be with you all.


These were the words from people who read that first entry and gave me the strength and courage to keep writing even though it was painful.


Writing this journal about Peggy has been life saving experience for me. Having so many people comment and send prayers has saved me in many ways.

To date....66,165 people have taken the time to write a comment or read this journal.

I will be forever grateful for the help and comfort this has provided.

I hope before the dead line of October 31st, I will have a new journal home and will give interested readers the address.

If I decide to stop writing about Watching.....I will say...


Goodbye from my sister....Peggy and from me.

I Love You Today, Peggy and always will remember our lives as sisters before Alzheimer's/Picks disease took you away from all who love you!

Mary Louise




Mary Louise